PCIT: Strengthening Families Through Coaching Parents Toward Connection and Calm

When Behavior Speaks: Listening Beneath the Acting Out

When a child acts out, it’s rarely about defiance; it’s communication.

Parent-Child Interaction Therapy (PCIT) gives parents tools to listen beneath the behavior and rebuild trust through connection.

PCIT is an evidence-based therapy for children ages 2 to 7 who exhibit challenging behaviors. What makes PCIT unique is its real-time parent coaching; while parents interact with their child, a therapist observes through a one-way mirror and provides live guidance through a small earpiece.

This “in the moment” feedback helps parents practice new strategies during real-life interactions, turning power struggles into opportunities for growth.

Phase 1: Child-Directed Interaction (CDI)

Focus: Strengthening the Parent-Child Relationship

Goal: Building trust, attention, and emotional safety

In this first phase, parents focus on nurturing connection rather than correcting behavior. They use PRIDE skills (Praise, Reflect, Imitate, Describe, and Enthusiasm) to increase positive attention and reduce negative behaviors.

The PRIDE Skills in Action

• Praise: Offer specific, genuine reinforcement. I love how you’re sharing your toys so kindly!”

• Reflect: Paraphrase what your child says to show understanding. Child: “I built a tower.” Parent: “You built a tall tower!”

• Imitate: Mirror your child’s play to show approval and partnership. If your child stacks blocks, stack blocks alongside them.

• Describe: Narrate your child’s actions to show focus and interest. "You’re drawing a big blue circle.”

• Enthusiasm: Bring warmth and energy to the interaction. Use a joyful tone and body language that says, “I love being with you.”

These micro-moments of connection are what shift children’s behavior from resistance to responsiveness.

Phase 2: Parent-Directed Interaction (PDI)

Focus: Setting Healthy Limits with Calm Confidence

Goal: Teaching children to follow directions through consistency

In this phase, parents learn to balance connection with structure. Coaching focuses on clear communication and predictable consequences:

• Give clear, one-step commands in a calm tone.

• Use consistent, short time-outs or logical consequences for non-compliance.

• Reinforce positive behavior immediately with specific praise.

Through repetition and coaching, parents build confidence, and children learn that expectations are both loving and reliable.

The Results of PCIT

Family-Level Goals

• Improve relationships: Strengthen the emotional bond and increase positive interactions.

• Increase compliance: Teach children to listen and respond the first time.

• Reduce problem behaviors: Lessen aggression, tantrums, defiance, and emotional outbursts.

Research-Based Outcomes

Studies show that PCIT produces lasting improvements in:

• Child behavior and emotional regulation

• Parental confidence and stress reduction

• Long-term family resilience

(See supporting resources at Child Mind Institute and PCIT International).

How PCIT Is Implemented

• Format: Weekly, one-hour sessions

• Duration: Typically 12-20 sessions

• Customization: Progress tracked through observation and standardized assessments

Each session builds on the last, helping parents master skills step by step, until the new patterns become second nature.

Why PCIT Works

As educators and caregivers, we know children thrive when adults model calm, consistent connection. PCIT works because it doesn’t just manage behavior; it heals relationships.

When parents apply these techniques daily, home life transforms from conflict to cooperation. Children feel safe, parents feel capable, and the family as a whole grows stronger.

Written by Derek Setser, educator and founder of Turning Scholars Into Leaders. Learn more about fostering trust and connection through Positive Behavior Support and Love and Logic Approaches.